Madonna’s “Hard Candy”

Madonna’s new album, “Hard Candy”, comes out in a few days. There is a preview of 30 seconds of each of her new songs over at VH-M (not sure how legal this is, but it features previously unreleased pictures and a personal message from Madonna, so I would assume it is an official site).

So, for this album Madonna supposedly went hip-hop. However, with the exception of her first single “4 Minutes”, when listening to these songs, it’s not hip-hop that I am hearing: it’s early ’80s disco/funk. You know, these cheap pop songs of the early ’80s that were the only things that survived the disco era of the ’70s. The kind of music you would hear in clubs in Greece at the time, and would appear in the cheap straight-to-VHS Greek comedies of the time. Now, this doesn’t mean that the album is that bad. In fact, it’s pretty nostalgic and has nice melodies. However, this is like saying that you are going to eat the peanut butter you were forced-fed by your grandmother as a kid, just because you want to remember your childhood and not because you like peanut butter. It’s “liking” for all the wrong reasons. Having said that, I will be buying the record, as I do like Madonna’s sound.

Based on these previews (that I’ve listened a number of times so far), my favorite songs are “Devil Wouldn’t Recognize You” and “Miles Away”. These two songs are indeed miles away from anything else in the rest of the album. On the second tier, I like “4 Minutes”, “Give It 2 Me” (her second single), and “Dance 2Night”. The rest are pretty yawwwwn…

Speaking of Madonna. I remembered a pretty embarrassing moment from my childhood. It was summer of 1985 (I was 12), and “Like a Virgin” was in its heyday. All girls in my age were infatuated with Madonna’s look and style. My cousin’s uncle arrived from Australia to visit for a few days. As my english were almost non-existent at the time, I went on and asked him: “There is this nice song we hear on the radio. What ‘like a virgin’ means?“. The guy gasped. After taking a big breath, he said that he is not familiar with the word.

It took me another 2 years to find out what the word “virgin” meant. And when I did, my first thought was: “FUCK“. How ironic.

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